Another First

It was another first day of school for me. I am scared out of my mind. I don't know why, maybe its the kids I am afraid I will not ever reach, maybe its the kids that don't care, maybe its the kids that think they can get away with anything. I don't want to have to deal with them this year. I hope that I can keep it together. I am feeling the need for some sort of crying cathartic experience tonight. Don't know what that will be. I look at these other teachers who are so excited to be in school, working with kids and doing what they love. Sometimes I wonder if I can be that good. How do they reach all the kids, how do they make the difference. I have been doing this for a couple of years now and I just got the feeling that I can do it. That was amazing. I am sitting here at my computer having some sort of light bulb moment. Ah-a! Calm and peace, crazy. Here it goes to another first, another first day, another first listen, another first kiss, another first laugh, another first time I tell my students that they are awesome!